Journal Entry- 01/01/2024

Chyenne was taking pictures of me next-to-naked at Coney Island Beach. The cold wind hugged my warm thighs. The ocean sang her song for us. I had always wanted to do a cold plunge into the sea. Feel my skin clench onto the last bits of warmth it can muster for itself. Be cleansed by the magic that is water. I impulsively decided on New Year's Eve that I would take this adventure on. I laid in the sand, a smile took over my face.

Like a child asking their parent for praise I asked, "Chyenne, do you see me right now?!?"

I was in disbelief at myself. How I've allowed myself to follow joy, to be impulsive, to love myself with ferocity. I never really felt that growing up. Alive. Present. I wondered if others saw that flame in me in that moment. If others saw me living.

"Nereyda from high school would be gagged," Chyenne responded.

And she really would be. I cried tonight for the joy I've opened myself to. For being naked with shame and great pride. For breathing. For loving myself. May I be present and rooted in my powers this year!